its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Randomize
