grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
the raccoons are back...
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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