The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
The beers last night were like the tears from god
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize
