I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
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