To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Randomize