Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Nobody cheats on THIS.
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