yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize
