She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
