sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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