I wanna eat
then eat your cupcake
Your dad touched me again.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.