I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
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