woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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