It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
