So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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