Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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