I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
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