spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize