i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
