He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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