Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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