took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
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