I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize