I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
We have so much sex to catch up on
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
