My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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