I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Randomize
