I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
You pole danced in your parka.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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