definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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