Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
its not stalking. its research.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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