I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
