true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Randomize
