Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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