even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
