You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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