Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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