I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
