oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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