You work out of a Hotel?
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Randomize
