it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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