last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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