she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
You may now shotgun with the bride
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
