oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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