You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
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