I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
what day is it and did you see me today?
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
