You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
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