Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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