White coat. Heels.
her vagine was all disorganized.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Randomize
