would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
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You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
So much Jack, so little girl.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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