dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
