I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
