We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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