there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
