don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
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I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
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and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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