Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Randomize
